6 hour workday maximum i’m not kidding, if it can’t be done in that timeframe it doesn’t need doing.
this doesn’t apply to jobs like childcare
If i worked in childcare and my 6 hours were up i would start putting babies in ziploc bags and shipping them to Turkmenistan listed as endangered fruits and vegetables
so this might be tmi but the first time i jacked off it was like 2005? I was playing the sims 2 for the first time and i didn’t know anything about Gay but i made my male sim kiss don lothario, which i didn’t think would work. i then googled “2 sims kissing (boys)” and that led me down a rabbit hole (lol sims 3 reference there), and yeah, ya know, I did the self-woohoo. that same night there was an oprah re-run about teenage pregnancy and i was horrified. oh my god, i was convinced i was pregnant, nevermind that i am a little cis gay boy with no uterus. nevermind that i was a virgin. i was CERTAIN I was pregnant. Like, 900%. I had done the nasty and had become filled with my own vile seed. I started getting really self-conscious about my belly expanding. I didn’t want to google anything about masturbation leading to pregnancy out of fear it would confirm all my worst fears. My male sim got abducted by aliens and came back with morning sickness. He gave birth to twin aliens. that confirmed it in my mind that it was biological possible for men to carry children, perhaps even their own.. what was i going to tell my parents when i gave birth to myself? anyway I went to the doctor with a cold and he asked me what was wrong and i told him i was pregnant and he pissed himself laughing. this whole ordeal lasted about 5 months, but the lasting effect will probably follow me to the grave.
RuPaul: [Dressed as an extravagant version of the Mulholland Drive nightmare lady] Our guest judge tonight is America’s sweetheart, David Lynch!
David Lynch: Hi Ru
RuPaul: So David, do you think the girls will Erase our Heads tonight, or will they leave our Velvets Blue?
David: I think they’ll be as good as a good cup of hot, black joe [Looks at the camera, his eyes begging you to get him out of there].
RuPaul: [Laughs like it’s the funniest thing she ever heard in her life. Michelle Visage is dressed like Diane Ladd in Wild at Heart and Carson as Ben from Blue Velvet, and laugh alongside Ru.] The category tonight is: Fire, Werk With Us, Henny!
[The whole runway plays backwards, so does the dialogue. The lights are red and blue, and they flash whenever the girls make a pose or an intriguing face. A jazzy version of “Sissy That Walk” plays in the background. One of the girls is actually The Giant in drag. The winner is a club kid version of the Black Lodge. The bottom queens lipsync to “The World Spins”.]
